Hi, everybody. I know that it has been a long time since I have last posted. But God has been dealing with me about my purpose and I want to do the will of my Father. When there is a will, there is surely a way.
With being Christian, there is much that you face naturally and supernaturally. That is because there is a constant battle for your soul going on. The Bible say that in this life we are going to have trials and tribulations. We have them at work, at home, at school and even at church. But I have learn in my coming up on 10 years of being saved on March 30th that no matter how old you get in the Spirit, you will still have to battle against the flesh and the spirit. Since I believe that this avenue is going to be used to help people, I am going to be transparent as I possibly can without being super explicit. *whew* Here goes:
Early this morning, I was in struggle with something that I have been trying to break free from for a long time. I was trying to go back to sleep but I couldn't. The images came and I was trying to resist at first. I really was. But it was like the images were becoming more and more real. I finally gave in. I felt like I have always felt afterwards. Like crap. I knew I let Heaven down. I repented. But soon after I repented I was attacked in my sleep and dreams. Let me explain. After the battle and after repenting, I was able to get back to sleep. In my dreams, I had a filthy, disgusting nightmare about me, a friend of mine and an holy hip hop female artist. I won't give any names. The dream was extremely distorted and evil. No sooner then I am able to wake up from my dream. I feel something grab my hand gently. I did not see who or what it was. I know that it was an evil spirit and this spirit was saying something I could not understand. With me knowing this, I immediately started rebuking it. Yet I could hear no noise coming from my own mouth. Nothing was working. So even with me not being able to hear myself talk, I still could call on Jesus. With me doing that, the spirit tried to hang on tighter. I kept calling on Jesus. And finally the spirit let me go. I was so relieved that Jesus set me free. I was grateful for just knowing that I think His name without having to actually say it an demons would leave me alone.
Listen, y'all. This walk with Jesus is not always pretty. It's not always without some type of drama. But yet while you are walking out your salvation, Jesus can give you a peace that can surpass all your understanding even when you mess up. I wish that I can bypass a lot of things that I have to go through but I cannot. I am learning that no matter what time of day it is, you have to learn how to kill your own flesh. Your flesh can cause you to fail every time if you don't bring it under subjection to the Holy Spirit. I am learning that more and more. You don't want to keep letting the Father down and letting yourself down as well. This war between flesh and spirit will not end until Christ raptures us away. In the meantime, we have subdue the powers and evils of this world and the powers and the evil that is within us. Remember, greater is He that is in you than he who is in the world. If you fall, repent and dust yourself off. And walk in God's grace and power to never bow down to that spirit or spirits ever again.
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